Grow up!

First published on Facebook on 3rd April 2023

Last night in a restaurant, the table next to us was occupied by a middle age couple and who seemed to be their teenage son. We were engrossed in our own conversation and their voices were damped due to the overall buzz in the restaurant, so we didn’t notice them for quite some time.

After a while their voices grew a little louder and it became clear that they were having a serious career discussion. The older man was talking relentlessly about his own struggles, persistent efforts and the success that followed. The young man was listening patiently, while the lady kept quiet for the most part, adding a few words here and there.

We thought it would end soon and the family would turn their attention to the delicious food on the table and the IPL match being projected on the big screen. Unfortunately the old man went on and on and on. At one point the kid looked visibly shaken and embarrassed as people from the surrounding tables kept glancing in their direction.

The old man’s voice was loud enough to reach us when he said, “मला कीव येते तुझ्या अकलेची, तुला काहीही करायचं नाहीये आयुष्यात, नुसतं आमच्या जीवावर जगायचंय…” (I pity your intellect or lack of it, you don’t want to do anything in your life, just want to live of our wealth…). At this point, the kid stood up hinting to wind up their dinner but the old man made him sit down and went on with his speech.

Eventually having exhausted all his curses, the man paid the bill and the trio walked out. The body language of the young fella was telling; head down, shoulders dropping, unwilling to look up and meet the eyes of those watching him.

I was filled with rage and sadness.

Felt like walking up to the kid, put an arm around his shoulder and say, “You will be fine young man, you will be fine. I failed my 12th class and I turned out just fine, you too will be fine.” Then walk up to the old man, punch him in the face and shout, “you deserve to die alone in an old age home you @$$O.”

I did none of that, just gulped down my beer and saw RCB register a comfortable win. We agreed that we were in no position to judge either of them based on bits of conversation that reached our ears. However we also wondered why the couple chose to have this conversation in a restaurant on a nice Sunday evening, they could have just as well “disciplined” the boy in the privacy of their home.

Generations after generations go about having no understanding, let alone any empathy for the tricky teenage. I wonder how much the young man’s mind will be scarred by such events. Which way his feelings would develop for his parents who choose to publicly humiliate him under the garb of being responsible parents? Will he care for them when he eventually grows independent (which he bloody well will) or will he walk away?

On a lighter note, I recalled the Bajaj Avenger advertisement and hoped that just like the rider, one day this fella will walk with his head held high and say with a smile, “I FORGIVE YOU…”

To all the kids out there, do your best, certificates are important but not everything. You will be fine.

To all the grown ups, GROW UP..!!!